Handling It

Handling It: Developing and Maintaining a Positive Mindset (ft. Christie Henriksen)

• Gavyn and Sierra • Episode 7

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Can you imagine uprooting your life, moving states twice, pouring your heart and soul into a dream business, only to lose it all? This week we chat with Christie Henriksen, a passionate and resilient groomer, who walks us through her journey of losing her beloved grooming salon, Uptown Pups, facing depression, and finding her way back. Christie's story is a testament to the strength we all possess, even when faced with unimaginable adversity.

Faced with depression and an identity crisis, Kristi challenges us to maintain a positive mindset and to continually strive for self-improvement. She sheds light on the grooming industry's competitive nature and shares valuable insights on staying focused, motivated, and creating a nurturing environment. Kristi invites us to reframe our perspectives, choose kinder words when dealing with ourselves, and provides a fresh perspective on avoiding the trap of toxic positivity. 

Finally, we delve into the importance of mental and physical self-care, particularly in hyper-competitive environments. Kristi imparts her wisdom on dealing with criticism and self-doubt, building confidence, and conquering anxiety. We also touch on the importance of recognizing personal boundaries, understanding the need to recharge, and maintaining a healthy balance between competition, teaching, and socializing. Christie's journey offers an invaluable look into the human side of the grooming industry, underscoring the importance of resilience, positivity, and community support.

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Speaker 1:

Hi, welcome back to another episode of Handling it. We have Kristi Henriksen here this week. Hi, kristi, thank you for being here.

Speaker 2:

Thank you for having me.

Speaker 1:

We're so excited. You're one of my favorite groomers, I think. Oh, I remember when you first moved to Austin, I was so excited. I was like, oh my gosh, she's going to teach me how to hand strip and she's going to teach me how to groom Westies and it's going to be great, Do?

Speaker 3:

you have indeed groomed Westies.

Speaker 1:

I don't. I'm going to learn someday. Cockers have taken over my life.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, they are a lot at work.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I bathe them every two days. There was a minute there where Kristi was helping us at the salon because we had somebody leave. They had a family emergency and they're up there with me Every other day. I'm bathing them and it's a whole thing, oh.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, Sierra, I didn't know if you knew, but I actually work with as the fur flies, and I'm actually at the south location, Gavin's at the north location.

Speaker 3:

Okay. Okay, yeah, he mentioned that previously, if we had questions or something he'd be like. Let me go ask Kristi, and I'm like Henry, what do you mean? I put the dots together. That's exciting, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Do you want to tell us, kristi, because you moved to Austin in the last year or so, right, so where? Did you live before that.

Speaker 2:

It's coming up to be two years. In October I lived in. I'm born and raised in Michigan, actually, and that's where I started my grooming career. I met my husband, we got married, and 2007, 2006, that era is when everything was starting to fall apart there in Michigan and everything was like okay we have nothing here, so I might as well move to Colorado.

Speaker 2:

My sister already moved out there and I just continued my grooming career there and we lived there for 15 years. I worked for someone and then decided I wanted to be my own boss and I booth rented for a little bit to build up my clientele and stuff like that and then, I opened up Uptown Pups my grooming salon and I had that, so then I actually had to close it. We had the COVID happen.

Speaker 2:

That drained everything and then, the whole complex got bought by a dealership and they kicked everyone else out, so they only gave me three months to get out. And I'm like I don't have money to go do a whole other salon, everything. And then my husband was actually working remotely and his company offered to move us out to Austin. He's a digital artist, so he can basically work forever.

Speaker 2:

But, when they get back into studio. They wanted him to come back into studio and work and they moved us out. We bought a house site unseen, moved out. It was like I closed my shop in end of June, we moved out in end of September, beginning in October, so everything just fell in, the place Closed out. My salon bought a house and we moved out here and I took about a year and a half off, actually with grooming and then, yeah, so I worked one day a week, basically Tuesdays.

Speaker 1:

That's a lot of change. That's a lot of change to go through in that amount of time.

Speaker 2:

It was, and it was really hard to keep a positive mindset, like I know you, that's what you want to talk about today, and like I went through it and it was so difficult because, like I felt like when okay, if I get emotional, I'm sorry that's okay. I'm sorry to the people who are listening, but it's still like it still hurts.

Speaker 2:

But like okay, so I put everything into that business. That was like me, Like I was the owner of Tom Pups. Yeah, I put my identity into that, like blood, sweat and tears. And then when that was moved away, like you know, taken from me, I was like who am I? And I like went down this downhill spiral and it probably didn't help that I like took a lot of time off because I was just like I don't know who I am, I don't know what I like.

Speaker 1:

Like.

Speaker 2:

I know I didn't want to own a business right away or you know at all, because I was just so burnt out. But it's like I lost who I was. Like I felt like a part of me died and it didn't help my clients, like they would come in and be like, oh, I'm not going to see you again, and they would give me like presents and money and all this stuff.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

I felt like I was waiting for my funeral to die.

Speaker 3:

And I like it killed me.

Speaker 2:

It really killed me, and so that was like 2021. When I moved here, I like wasn't a funk for quite a while. I know January of 2022 is like I need to change something because, like this is not. I'm like basically living my life just trying to get through the day so I can get to the next day, and it's just like I'm just. I'm basically wasting time to die. I don't know how to describe it and that was like it was a. I was depressed.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's like a really traumatic thing to go through. Yeah, how long were you there? Uptown pups.

Speaker 2:

Well, I had for like about 13 years.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, 13 years and then one day somebody told you you have to get out, and that's like. No warning. That's very traumatic.

Speaker 3:

And then you have your sister and your life like this my sister actually didn't live, okay, so she.

Speaker 2:

So when we moved to Colorado like a year later she moved you know, to a different state. So like we stayed there. But yeah, she's back in Michigan and yeah, so we don't live by any family. So but I guess it was also harder because moving here I didn't know anybody and we didn't have a family or anything like that. So just reaching out to the groomers here in Texas have been awesome, like Gavin's been amazing, and like I come go my dog at your salon. I'm sorry, Each other.

Speaker 3:

Before you went to Austin did you kind of know that that was, he was kind of in your area or that was just a follow each other, like on Instagram.

Speaker 1:

That was really like the extent of it she had posted. Christie posted one day and I, like a local group, like I need to bathe and drive my Samoy. Can somebody let me borrow their salon? And I was like oh my god, me like come to my salon. Yeah, I was ready I volunteer because I knew just like how knowledgeable and she was she's like shows dogs and I was just like this is gonna be great, and so we got to meet each other like that way.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so I didn't actually showing dogs. I was a 15, I got my first show dogmas 15 and I'm doing it forever now feels like.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so grooming really is like a part of your identity. You've been doing it for like everything.

Speaker 2:

I did is part of my life. So when I lost that, those huge chunk, I'm like, oh my gosh, like who am I? What I like to do, what kind of hobbies do I like? I'm like I don't even know, like everything. I do is evolves around dogs and I just like I Don't know. It's just it's kind of sad.

Speaker 1:

But I Hear it's crazy to hear like you get emotional about that, because any time like I'm around you, you always have like this great energy. You're always like so willing to help people and teach people and you're just so friendly. So I think it's like one of those things where it's important, like no matter how you see somebody presenting like, we're all people and we're all going through something, and I think that's why it's really important to like Try to have a positive mindset or, if you don't have one, at least work on like practicing gratitude, to like get to that point because yeah, I appreciate, I just appreciate you open that up, because a lot of people don't realize how how that feels, or like they see someone like you, christie, with what?

Speaker 3:

like 40 plus thousand followers on Instagram, like who would never feel these dark feelings. She would never feel like she didn't have an identity. What do you mean? She doesn't have an identity. Look at her like it's good to show and I'm so happy you did, even though I'm so sad for you to but like it's just gonna help that person listening and realizing oh, everyone feels like that every once in a while. I mean, I know.

Speaker 3:

I felt dark. My identity was also grooming, and then I threw children in there and then I felt like my children took my identity. So I kind of understand that to a point. But I've never not groomed, I've never not had my. I've just had to share my stuff, which that's not the same thing at all, but I know how dark and alone and it how it could feel.

Speaker 1:

One thing I want to like talk about while you're here too. Okay, as you said, you've been showing dogs since you were young, when did you start competing. Like when did you make that? Like when did you discover that grooming competitions were a thing, and how did you like get into that arena?

Speaker 2:

2011. I think it's my first grooming competition, so like I always want to try to be the best and so I got my Certification master certification through a national dog groomer association. I'm like, okay, what's next? And then there was competition that was in Colorado at the time Colorado groom fast and my wife Was boothery at the time and the lady was booth running from. She's like you should just go do it. She's.

Speaker 2:

So I just like went and I did it and I didn't even know I had to go to like the competitors meeting. I didn't know anything. I started in B, level B, so intermediate, because, like I showed dogs before, because she was like you could start an entry, but she's like you should start and be like okay, like whatever. So I got my first placement there with a little mixed dog. She was a she shot and made her into a Portuguese water dog.

Speaker 2:

And then I competed the year after that and then I was bumped up to a Division open. So I was an intermediate twice before I got bumped up and that was crazy. And then I felt like I Was at the end of the pool drowning and they're like here, here's some more dogs for you to groove. And like I tried to catch up with everybody because, like I was competing next to Olga At the time, I'm like what the heck am I doing here? But it just encouraged me to like be better, because I'm like these dogs are so gorgeous, like I want to be able to create that beautiful artwork piece. Yeah, so then I've been competing like just a few times a year. I don't do anything like hardcore, like this past year I've been really pushing that. But yeah.

Speaker 2:

That's why I like challenging myself.

Speaker 1:

That is so real. Like I'm kind of going through that. What you were describing right now that's been this here for me is going from like Intermediate to open, and then it's it's not like you're starting over because you have like the skill set that you developed, but it's just like an entirely different thing and it's really easy to get down on yourself and like Want to compare yourself to the people around you. That's another thing where, like that mindset has to come in of, like you're still learning, you're still growing.

Speaker 1:

Yeah it's like you have to choose to show up anyways and you have to choose to, like, learn something from it, you know. So it's like when I'm next to like all of these people, that I look up to you, like you being one of them like. Going into compete and you're there. I'm like this is scary, but I Try to focus on the same thing.

Speaker 2:

You know I'm competing with. I decided to compete with myself, so people around me to change that mindset. Like you know, I'm here to put a damn good groom on this dog and I'm gonna do my best, and if I win, perfect. If I don't you know.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I've noticed like that's when I can really do my best work, even if it's like just at the salon or if it's at a contest or a dog show or whatever. I do my best work whenever I just like get in my zone and I'm having fun and I'm not worried about what everyone else around me is doing or thinking or saying. Because the minute that you like start to I don't know if this is relatable, but for me, the minute that I start to like get in my head and just be anxious of like this person is thinking this or like these people watching probably think I look crazy, I'm sweating, it's like a mess that's when I start to like spiral and be really down on myself.

Speaker 1:

Yeah so my set has been like a thing for me. Yeah, this year is really trying to work on that.

Speaker 2:

Keeping a positive attitude is, like key because, like, you need to speak like good stuff to yourself, because your body reacts to whatever you're thinking, and like, be careful with how you speak and what you say to, because that your body and your atmosphere will respond to it. So that's why, like with my Instagram, like I wanted to be like a positive, uplifting, safe community that people can come and feel safe and enjoy you know, grooming content and I don't want to sit there in bash and be negative, like or complain about clients, man, like they are paying your bills.

Speaker 2:

Why are you complaining about them, like I know? They're not all great, but there's sometimes our job sucks, so why put it on the internet? So you're seeing it, you know, experiencing it and then seeing it again.

Speaker 3:

You're home and you can see it all over again.

Speaker 1:

Yeah it's kind of just like that's another thing when mindset is like shifting what you choose to focus on. That's something that I've been like trying to work on recently. I'm on like this is not good. My therapy is like mental health TikTok, where I like learn things that people learn from their therapist.

Speaker 1:

And one thing that I see a lot is just like reframing the way that you like speak to yourself or about yourself or like your situation. So, for example, like when you say like I'm having a bad day, instead of saying I'm having a bad day and just speaking that into the universe. It's shifting the mindset to be like I had a rough start this morning, but I'm recovering and today can be a good day still. It's like little things like that that you have to consciously like change the way that your brain is like thinking these things.

Speaker 1:

And it really does make a huge difference, like I have noticed, so much like relief in my anxiety just from like changing my viewpoint on things like that.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I mean, you do have a choice of how you think. So that's what I believe. So choose good thoughts, good. And another thing like I like to do, like if I'm really down, like I roll right down like 10 things I'm thankful for and it can be hard sometimes, like, like it's like. Ok, I'm thankful from husband. Thank you, thankful from how I was thankful. I was like no, like you guys sit there and think like what are you truly thankful for? That makes you want to get up, that fills your.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, I was going to say something me and Siri used to talk about. A lot was like we would like have mantras for each other, so like if something is like overwhelming for you, it's just the mantra for that week. Like if you have something scary coming up, the mantra for that week might be like I am capable of anything I set my mind to.

Speaker 3:

Yeah right now my name about there was positivity is a choice and Chris, chris, do you literally just said that like in a different sense.

Speaker 3:

Like because it's really right now. It's really hard for me to be positive, like I'm probably in my, like, darkest era. Oh, it's my villain era or my darkest era. But positivity is a choice. Is like, ok, I have to choose to be happy or else my mind will like go somewhere else. So like choose happiness. Like so, yeah, mantras and my gratitude book and all. Is there anything other? Like anything you do for, like self practice, like how Gavin said he goes on TikTok and you like something? Is there anything that you've seen work?

Speaker 2:

So, so what? I? I read a lot of like self help books and I actually there's this lady called her, called her name Sorry, her name is Angie Belmar and she has this like it's a planner, but it's a daily grind planner and every day she makes you write out like what you're thankful for.

Speaker 2:

And that helps me a whole lot. And just I don't know Like I feel like after reading some of the health self help books, I just kind of program it into my head to like be positive, and it's like now I spent a year and a half since I've been doing that and I think it's really changed. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So it's, funny that like you're like, oh, you're so happy and so that my whole life, my whole life, everybody is like are you OK? Like you should smile more, you like certain stuff. So I'm like for you to say that I was like oh, wow, thank you.

Speaker 3:

You know, we're like this year and a half as well, and that's the only rest of it. So, like I'm, so I ask Gavin who's like, who's the most positive person in this industry that we could bring up, because I feel like our industry needs this right now.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I totally agree. Yeah, I totally agree, because, like, facebook can be nasty. I'm like, oh my God, like would you say that to your grandma, your Catholic grandma?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and another thing I want to talk about is like I don't want to be like talking about I don't want to talk about positivity in a way that makes it seem like we're promoting like toxic positivity, because that's fully a thing to right, like there's yeah, there's bad things that happen in the world and there's bad things that happen in our life and it's normal to be sad.

Speaker 1:

It's a normal human emotion to like feel it and right go through that. But the important thing is to like be able to feel those things but also recognize that there's there's goodness at the other side of that.

Speaker 1:

You know there's this quote that I like a lot. I think I probably saw it on TikTok too. This is really bad that I get all my like information from TikTok, but it's like it said I know that goodness exists in the world because I am good and I think about that a lot. Whenever I get like overwhelmed by the state of like the world or just like things happening or all of these like anti LGBT or like women laws, it's like I have to have to think like I know there's goodness in the world because I'm good and I have family that is good and I have friends who are good, and like that has to mean something. You know it can't just be the negative thoughts that take up all of your, all of your energy, because that will start to consume you.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, totally.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I was going to ask you like whenever you, do you ever get like anxious before competing or showing anymore, or is that like so long?

Speaker 2:

Definitely not for showing. I'm definitely comfortable in that round. But I just sometimes like, if I know my dogs that prepped right, like my like, for my example, my Westies like I can see, like if there's a layer underneath there and it's like there's nothing there, I'm like gosh, dang it. Then I get anxious and like well, this is going to be a waste, but I'm going to do my best and maybe I'll place. Yeah, but I don't get anxious anymore. But I used to be so bad, like I used to compete with my bachons, I used to wear rubber gloves because my hands would sweat so much Because, like, I would be done holding the dog in place and then you would start to curl because my hands were so sweaty. Oh, it was so bad.

Speaker 1:

I really did. I sweat a lot and that is like one of my number one things that I get embarrassed about when I compete, but I've just like started to embrace it. I'm like I'm sweating because I'm working hard and you guys can all see it now and yeah it's just, it is what it is, you know. But the reason I asked I was going to ask you if there's anything that you do beforehand to like prepare yourself, or if there's any like rituals you have that make, or have made, competing easier over time.

Speaker 2:

Hmm, I think, like I try to, I do a lot of imagination of like, imagining winning and stuff and and just I look at photos that I want my dog to look like and I get that burned image in my head and be like, oh, this is what I'm going for and I feel like confident that I can do it and that has helped me. But I'm just the type of person that I go and do things like I'm not very hesitant, like I'm not afraid to go do things Not anymore.

Speaker 2:

I used to be in the beginning, but the more you do it, the easier it becomes. Yeah, it's just, it's just so true it's like a muscle. Basically, it's almost like you're practicing and then it just becomes like your performance. So Mm.

Speaker 3:

hmm, yeah, there's there's value in that, and I was just listening to an Edmila podcast. Does anyone listen to Edmila, or am I the only one?

Speaker 1:

You're the only one.

Speaker 3:

Okay, well, he just don't look at what he looks like, so it ruins everything.

Speaker 2:

But I'm going to have to look now.

Speaker 3:

You can't because then you're like I can't listen to this guy anymore. But he, he just talked about that Today. I was just listening to. What you just touched on was like building that muscle of like that.

Speaker 3:

You might be really scared in the beginning, you might be really hesitant, you might actually not even show up, even though you prepared and you want to go do it. But once you do it two, three, four, five times that, sixth time you're going to know what the venue is going to look like, you're going to know what the atmosphere is, you're going to know what to expect, and then you're gaining that confidence. And then every other time you go in there now you're just gaining knowledge and now you're one of the you know, hopefully, but even if you're not one of the best, you're still working on yourself or that dog or whatever sport you're in or whatever it is that you are constantly working towards, on being the best version of that, what you ever like, how you just said, imagine to be, or manifested to be, or your goal to do and want to be. So, yeah, you're just I think that's the. I think for someone new that's listening to like wow, christy's not even nervous Like what you were.

Speaker 2:

I was so nervous yeah, Honestly doing this like I used to be so afraid to speak in front of people.

Speaker 2:

I used to like cry I know a lot of cry and like I, when I was younger, I did a lot of like speech stuff because like and so I'm like you know what Everybody messes up, because it used to be such an issue for me that I was like I have to be perfect, I have to have my speech perfect, and it's like I mess up now no big deal because I come up with some crazy stuff, but just going, just actually like teaching with dog grooming, has helped me build confidence. And speaking in front of people and even doing this like is a big deal for me to speak.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

I don't know if I can listen to this afterwards, but just being here and be able to talk to you guys, like have conversation, and it's a big deal, it's like dang, like I can do this. It's like when you start saying I can't, you're right, you can't because you made a decision that you can't move forward, but if you change your mindset, be like okay, I will be able to do this. Not that I can't right now, but you will be able to.

Speaker 3:

It might be, even now, but it won't be later.

Speaker 1:

Exactly, and I feel like or this is something I used to think, at least was I I wanted to be able to just go in the competition ring or like the dog show ring and be confident, like I thought it was something that people just like put on, like you, just it's almost like a, like a mask that you wear, like you can just put on confidence. But that's not really how it works. The way that you build confidence is by setting goals for yourself and like showing up for yourself. Yeah, and the more that you consistently show up for yourself, the more that you get that confidence. And it's not that it's a feeling that you put on, it's just it's something that you can see in somebody. You can see that, like I can see that you've shown up for yourself, christy, and that like you got in the ring and you kept going, like you had this horrible thing happen to you and you lost your business, but you still like got up and kept going and like that is what confidence looks like.

Speaker 1:

It's knowing that bad things are going to happen, but knowing that you're going to be able to show up for yourself anyways. And I think that's been a really good thing for me to learn, because I used to get so jealous of like I would see people in the ring and I'm like they just know what they're doing, Like they were just born to be here, but I don't think that's true for anybody. We all have to try.

Speaker 2:

We all have to fail.

Speaker 1:

Exactly, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

There's been plenty of competitions where I walked away with nothing and it's just like. You know what my dogs look amazing, you know. It's just, every dog looks amazing there. You know we're all winners, but it's just. It comes down to hairs, you know, like a split hair.

Speaker 2:

Like when I, when I found out that I was first place for jackpot and then I got bumped down to second because of one hair, I was just like dang it, Like I was so upset with myself. But you know, like next year, next year I'll remember that area, like that I missed. And you just keep learning, you just keep learning. You start learning judges what they like and what they don't like.

Speaker 1:

So the reality is like there's more, there's going to be more losses than wins, like for everyone. But what separates, like, the good groomers from the best groomers is the best groomers make the most out of their losses, like they learn something from them and they apply it to the next groom and you use that to like keep pushing yourself forward. And I'm not saying that that's easy because it's in the beginning. It's really not.

Speaker 1:

And it's easy to feel like you're putting like yourself on display and it's being like somebody's telling you it's not good enough, but you just have to be able to be mature enough to like recognize that this is an opportunity for growth and I think that's the thing that scares people a lot from competing is you're going and you're trying to put your best out there for a judge and they might tell you that it is completely wrong and you need to change everything about it.

Speaker 1:

But they're not doing that because they're trying to be down on you. They're there, at the end of the day, to help you grow.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you have to be able to receive a critique.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, oh, yeah, for sure, yeah, yeah, I was.

Speaker 1:

I went to teach a little like private class today at the salon that hosted me and they were asking me, like they were asking me, like how you're able to like go to a show and like take a critique, and like how you go about that, and it's just like I.

Speaker 1:

This is how I feel about like education too is I try to learn from everyone, like there's something that you can learn from everyone. So I will hear out anybody, I will hear what they have to say, but then I just keep what I need you know. So they might tell me 10 different things that I don't necessarily agree with. That I don't feel like I need to put on my dog, but if I can get one valuable thing from that and keep it forever, like it's worth it, you know. So that's how I feel about critiques is like if we're talking about trying to turn that into a positive, is like that this judge might say X, Y and Z, but I just worked with a breeder who said the opposite thing. Well, that's fine, I can. They're not necessarily wrong. They have their own opinions, but I can. I can pick out something from that and keep it with me and carry it forward, even if I don't need it now.

Speaker 1:

I might later if they're judging me again or you know, things like that.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and that could be like for any industry. Anything is like people are always going to give you opinions and you take what sits right with you and what you think you know. I mean, obviously, critiquing for dog grooming competitions is a little different because, like you know, you want to take, take it and be better and maybe place the next time or do a little bit better than last time, but that's for anything, as if anyone gives you open critiques or anything like that.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and one thing I've learned. I realized what I was doing was like when they were giving me critiques, I would make excuses every time they would point something out. It's like just be quiet and listen to what they say and then you can internalize it and think about it later, Like because I would be like, oh well, this and this and that, or like you know, like I would make excuses for something, like I was like trying to change their mind for their placements.

Speaker 2:

Already I'm like they were placements already done with you, know you know, so I was like Thank God they had a little bit of niche. Bye. That's like why I did that. But I realized that I'm like I need to stop that like I'm. I'm getting like a basically a free critique. You know, I don't want them. Yeah like look down on me and something that. So yeah, I used to do that a lot was bad.

Speaker 3:

No, I did that with Sterling, with Jay. Oh, I love Sterling.

Speaker 2:

I want you to do Sterling. He needs a kiss and a nose, like right now.

Speaker 3:

Although he just got a patch of sticky like stickers and I had a Dean at him yesterday and I bought that. But but no, I did that to Jay and and I was on the phone with Corey and I was like I think he screwed up. He's like what do you mean my husband? I was like well, jay kept asking me and he's like, does he have like some broken coat? And I'm like no, he has really great coat but he works. He like you know it was a farm dog and then like everything he had asked, I wish I would have just been like agreed with what everyone's asking, because he was obviously asking, because he saw it and so I was in there like trying to like Prove him wrong, I don't know.

Speaker 3:

And then then you sit there and you're like, oh shit, I probably earned that third place because I had an answer, like if I would have said, yeah, he came in with some broken coat. I think it's just like you're nervous and you know you want to like.

Speaker 2:

Defensive too, because I just did a good job. Like what he's saying is not good. Like you can't tell what shocker is.

Speaker 3:

But yeah, I know exactly what you mean, because I just did that.

Speaker 1:

It's just like it's not even I don't think it's because you're nervous or anything. Your the job of your brain is to protect you, right? So when somebody is like criticizing something, that you just put a lot of work into your brain, like, even if you don't want it to, that's where it might take it, like it might take it somewhere to Try to make you feel better, to like protect your ego, but it's something you have to like train your mind. To do is like similar to training your mind. To have a different mindset is like Letting your, your brain can go there, but it's just like okay, this is just a thought and it can leave and I can, I can try to listen to this and I can get as much as I can from this. That's like. The hard thing about mindset, though, is like your brain is a muscle and you can't just wake up one day and everything is gonna be great and you're gonna think positive thoughts. Like you have to really like actively Train your brain to it takes work.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it takes a lot of ego, he goes tough man. It's hard, it really is hard, but I think that's what makes like groomers especially competitive groomers, like such amazing people is like we're choosing to put ourselves on display to better ourselves in the long run, and that's not easy to do. It's not easy to put yourself on display.

Speaker 3:

Speaking of ego, though, what do you guys do? So as competitors and and like trying to be the best? Us like walking into those places and you know you have classes to teach. Maybe you're competing, you have friends that want to meet up for drinks, like, how do you guys balance all of that and Trying to be this positive person the entire time?

Speaker 2:

Well, number one thing important is most important to me is getting sleep like I won't be, I try to like schedule myself as much sleep as possible. You know, it's just kind of hard when there's like poodles and bachons, like one day.

Speaker 2:

Yeah but Trying to keep that, like I don't stay out late and drink and so I don't ever really drink, but I'll have dinner with someone and then go to bed, like I. That's that's a big key is get as much rest as possible because like you need it. You're, you know, you're basically like a groomer athlete and you need to get the best food and the sleep as much as possible so you can perform the best. That, I think, helps me keep an apposite mindset with the grooming competition. So yeah yeah.

Speaker 1:

I'm gonna be honest with you, I can't do it all like I. I go to competitions and I want to go hang out with all my friends and I want to go meet all these people that I know online and I want to compete and I want to teach and I want to do everything, but I, I really just can't. So I feel bad a lot of times. That trade shows is because, like Usually, like I can compete in my batteries like empty.

Speaker 1:

So, after I compete I at least have to get a nap and then I can maybe go like hang out with friends or go, you know, go have dinner or things like that. But I think people just have different, we all have different like levels of Energy in terms of like we're what we can do socially, what we can do physically, you know, and I I just get really Like socially overwhelmed.

Speaker 1:

So, sometimes it's like after competing especially like doing two classes back to back like I just need To sit in the dark for an hour and then I'll be okay after that.

Speaker 2:

I need to go numb my brain Media like a tiktok and be like, okay, my brain's numb Really.

Speaker 3:

Atlanta together and he took a nap and I like welcome up, like do you want me to door-dash cheesecake? Yeah, he does really do that. He does take some naps and and then I don't think we left. I think we watched Jeffrey Dahmer and we ate cheesecake that night and that's probably exactly what we needed yeah.

Speaker 1:

So if you're and you're not a competitor and you want to like meet competitors and like learn about how everything works, do not have your feelings hurt if they're not like available right after they compete or like after a show, because like it's not you, it's just like it really is just exhausting. I will always be nice to anybody and I will always be happy to answer questions. My face might not show it, but I'm happy to be there competing.

Speaker 1:

Yeah it's just overwhelming. Yeah, how. I'm curious. How do you keep a positive mindset when you're trying to learn something new, like so, for example, if you're moving into a new breed that you've never groomed before, but you're pretty confident in your skills? Otherwise, how do you approach that and still maintain that positive mindset? Because really it's like it's like starting over on some breeds, like you're really learning from scratch. So I'm curious how you go about that.

Speaker 2:

Honestly, like poodles have been the most difficult for me because, like I used to show Bashaans and Grim and show them and I it took me like I feel like this last trim I did at In Houston was the best poodle trim I ever done.

Speaker 1:

Oh my god, it was.

Speaker 2:

Thank you and like, if it's taken to me like three, four years of really like Trying to learn the breed, because like I was so confused, like people would tell me something different, like their rears are different, I'm like, well, they have like that, you know, pointy, like poodle Puffy shelf, but or they have like a three degree. It's like like, well, what's you know what's appropriate and what's not. And my issue was like I was constantly bashaning my poodles and that was so fresh with me and I would go take lessons. And I'm like you know, I'm gonna nail this, like and I was started to look, like I said before, like I find pictures I really liked and I would try to burn those images in my head and I was having issues with the front assembly, like how to do that, because I was constantly be shawing it.

Speaker 3:

It wasn't like poodle in it.

Speaker 2:

So I I got lessons, I went and did lessons and I would drive I drive an hour To go practice on poodles like even in Colorado would drive an hour to go practice on poodles and then came here and I drive all the way up to round rock, probably at least once a month. Room of poodle up there, just a constant practice. Like it will take time. You know sometimes things, you pick up things easier than others, like terriers or no, no big deal, like I, I Don't know, but the poodles were hard. So just know that you will get there. You Just enjoy the journey of learning and you will get there. It's like if you get so Fresh and cut up you know in your head that you can't enjoy the process, like you won't ever really enjoy like the finished product.

Speaker 3:

Yeah it's so good.

Speaker 1:

I agree with that. Yeah, I have a similar Relationship with bootles and for a minute there I thought I was like great. I feel I was like wow, I really got this trimmed down, like I got it. And then I started grooming American cockers and I I don't want to say I learned it fast, because I I mean I kind of learned it fast, but I was I was spending like I was going to Spaniel Club, I was bathing cockers every other day I was going to a breeder's house nearby grooming her dogs, like you're a nurse.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I was. I was doing it non-stop, and so whenever I felt like I got the hang of that and then I went to groom my poodle again, it almost made me mad because I was like I spent almost a extra year trying to learn this trim and I just figured this other trim out in half the time and.

Speaker 1:

So it was like I just had to remind myself that I have one poodle and I can only groom him, like you know. Yeah, every so often, but I am I found all these cocker opportunities around me. Cocker opportunities, what a weird thing to say. I've gone all these opportunities around me to practice and so I took advantage of them and like so of course I got better at that, faster. That's just makes sense, mm-hmm, so it's just so you're able to practice that muscle.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1:

It's just that competence of like setting goals for yourself and showing up for yourself. I think that's really all you can do and just Just focusing on what's to come. You know, I I definitely just shaved my poodle, though I said I'm in a Conti I I needed something new. I Feel like I had been working on the German for so long and I just felt kind of stuck and I see all these.

Speaker 1:

Contis, and for a Long time I was telling myself like, oh, I wish I could do that, like I wish I could. I'll never be able to do that.

Speaker 2:

Again, are you gonna do like you're gonna do spray up, girl. I'm gonna do modified.

Speaker 1:

I think I'll see how long it takes to grow into a modified. If he grows really fast, I might just say, screw it and see how long it takes for him to grow into a spray up. But I was just telling myself like I'll never be able to do that and it's like, well, why not? So I just yeah, I'm just did it like you will.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I can't do that, or the only thing stopping me. So I got home from Houston and I was like you know what, I'm tired of looking at this haircut like let's just do it, let's just go for it. So I shaved my dog and he's growing into a Conti.

Speaker 2:

I'm excited. That's our heart. Like I Practice. Like I'm not a big poodle fan. Like I don't think I will ever own one. Yeah but I enjoy their, their, their trends. It's just, it's a challenge.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I don't know if I'll ever live with a poodle again after this, but I do love Grimina. No offense to all you poodle people out there. So you're ready, got anything else.

Speaker 3:

Should I read off some quotes that I read and see what you guys, if there's anything that like hits a chord or anything you can relate to or if you just want to pick, like one or two okay, where you are now in life is the sum of the decisions you've made. What do you guys feel about that quote I think.

Speaker 1:

I think that's true to like an extent.

Speaker 1:

Yeah because it's definitely a real thing that, like I'm not saying like you should become a victim of circumstance, but like the things that happen around you affect you, and I think to say otherwise is kind of it's a little bit ignorant, like you can't necessarily control, like where you grew up and this the things that affected you. But I think the decisions that you make for yourself and like the way that you choose to process what's happening around you is it definitely does in the, at the end of the day, like shape who you are and also who you're going to become. So you just have to be able to take that responsibility, to like Understand I might not be able to change the situation, but I can change, like how I'm reacting to the situation.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I totally agree. Yeah, your adulthood, you know, even though you can't control it, like you said, like how you were brought up or anything but in your adulthood, like the decisions you make now, does Make it different for the future.

Speaker 2:

Mm-hmm. Yeah, I totally agree. Like you said it perfectly, I have nothing to add, I know.

Speaker 3:

Gavin well, I was, and from one of our most recent projects, and I can't even watch me because Gavin is so good and I have to say things slower and I say um, and I start all over and. Gavin, just like I swear he could read in his eyes Like he has a teleprompter and he says things that I've never heard him say before. But when the camera is on, he is on and I don't understand this gift. But he has a gift.

Speaker 1:

I Will say that, like I consider myself to be a pretty like introverted person, I always like tell people that I'm a listener, like I'm always listening first and then like Speaking later. And like, growing up I really didn't talk much at all. I was a very quiet, quiet kid, and so I just grew up listening to everything and like internalizing a lot, and I feel like that's kind of a gift, because now that I'm older, I just like spent all that time like reflecting on the things that other people said and the way that they were acting, and it helps me just like. It helps me understand, like the way that people feel and the way that, like people are trying to communicate and what they're trying to communicate. So it's just one of those things. Like I Don't think I have a gift, I think I just listen.

Speaker 3:

I'm just like I'm not a talker, I'm a listener, so it helps me but when you talk, man like and it's like you don't Hesitate, like, like, um, yeah, you know you don't have a lot of filler words, nope, I do old soul, same Christie, like he makes me every time I listen to the podcast or like okay, we love Gavin Sears, kind of like, hi, I feel like you're just an old soul and like you are a young Christie. How old are you if you don't want to share this time?

Speaker 2:

I am 39, 39.

Speaker 1:

Wow, I literally thought you were like yeah, thank you.

Speaker 3:

Like he's such an old soul, like mm-hmm, for everything that he could do, and like what you've learned this career, gavin. What four years ago?

Speaker 2:

Yeah yeah, four years. It's amazing what you have done in four years, like I've been doing this for 20 years.

Speaker 3:

I'm just now learning how to listen, gavin. Like I'm just now learning how to keep my mouth shut and just take it like and Just listen to people and then have my comments and only say it to my husband. Like I'm just learning how to put out dumpster fires and that's start them all over again, like what you like. You're probably one of my Only friends that could be like completely drama-free and completely like I don't know. Just so put together.

Speaker 1:

Thank you. That's how I feel about Christie. I think a lot of it is like energy, and it's not necessarily the things that anybody says or does that I'm picking up on. It's just like I Pick up on energy and intent a lot, and I think that's why I'm like so drawn to you, christie, as a person is because you know, like you said, even if you're not smiling 24-7, like that doesn't necessarily make you a happy person. It's just like your energy and your intent and your willingness to like help people and to show up for other people, but like mostly to show up for yourself, because that's where, like I think, positivity comes from is Showing up for yourself, because if you don't have any energy for yourself, you can't give anything to your dogs, you can't give anything like to your clients or to the people who want to learn from you.

Speaker 1:

So it's just learning to show up for yourself first. Yeah, I see that in you, christie, a lot, so I think that's why I'm like, so drawn to you and I respect you so much. Well, before we wrap up, where can anybody on the podcast find you like on Instagram or Facebook?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I'm mostly on Instagram Christie Henriksen, if you just look up my name and CMG, I'm the one holding my Westie and then, like I don't know, tick-tock, that's kind of like I Really post on there anymore but, mainly in cigarette. I know tick-tock is weird.

Speaker 1:

You also. Christie also saw stripping knives. So if you need stripping, I'm pushing more than she is. We taught a glass together a couple months ago. I was pushing those knives harder than she was.

Speaker 2:

I don't know, I just I'm so weird about them I maybe I should push them more.

Speaker 1:

But well, follow Christian Instagram and then go by with black metal.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I, I have a really like I Didn't I see for a little bit, but that was. I need to order some.

Speaker 1:

Okay, if you guys, don't follow Chrissy. Go follow her and look at her Westie rooms and then you'll be like, okay, yeah, I'm gonna buy these and buy these knives.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, where do I buy these knives? At.

Speaker 2:

You just message me like, because, like I don't have a link set up for to buy them anymore, Like I had them on Etsy. But it's like I felt weird because I didn't like physically make them. It's like that's how. I don't know, I don't know, I'm so weird about them, but I am.

Speaker 1:

Well, thank you for being here today, Chrissy. We really appreciate it.

Speaker 2:

Thank you so much. I feel so honored to be on your guys's podcast, because this is my first.

Speaker 3:

Tree.

Speaker 2:

I will have to when you guys get the link.

Speaker 3:

Yes, we will, so it'll be on Monday.

Speaker 2:

Oh my goodness, okay yeah. Thank you guys for listening to me, because I yeah, it was great, I had a blast.

Speaker 1:

You guys, oh well, thank you. Thank you to everyone who listened.

People on this episode

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Gavyn Freeman

Co-host
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Sierra Elbert

Co-host